Computer Terminology

486 - The average IQ needed to understand a P.C. state - of - the - art computer you can't afford.
Obsolete - Any computer you own.

Microsecond - The time it takes for your State - of - the - art computer to become obsolete.

Syntax Error - "Hello, I want to buy a computer and money is no object.

GUI (pronounced "gooey") - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it.

Computer Chip - Any starchy food stuff consumed in mass quantities while programming.

Keyboard - The standard way to generate computer errors.

Mouse - An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.

Floppy - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.

Hard Drive- The sales technique employed by most computer salesmen.

Portable Computer - A device invented to force business men to work at home, on vacation and on business trips.

Disk Crash - A typical computer response to any critical deadline.

Power User - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.

System Update - A quick method of trashing ALL of your current software.

Frog's Date

Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?"

"No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."